The Power of a Praying Wife: Chapter 28 – His Self Image
- By: Hallee
But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord. 2 Corinthians 3:18
Our pastor preached a sermon one time on marriage and said, “I can go to work and get beat up by work colleagues all day long. I can get cut off in traffic, I can get talked over in meetings, I can get disrespected by my associates. And I can come come to my wife who is my biggest cheerleader and who tells me I’m wonderful and can do it, and nothing else will matter. The rest of the world just fades away into unimportant.”
Mark Gungor, author of the brilliant Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage, said something similar. “I can have the best show I’ve ever done, help hundreds of couples with their marriage, get audience feedback and affirmations left and right, but if my wife doesn’t take my face in her hands and say, ‘You did great. Wonderful show,’ then it doesn’t mean anything.”
I think a husband’s self esteem can and often is directly affected by his wife’s respect of him and whether or not she is his biggest fan. I don’t think that is always the case, of course. You can potentially have all sorts of issues – past baggage, current situations, addictions, depression — but I think over all, you can find it to be true.
Which is why I found the scenario presented by Stormie very interesting. Wife constantly onto husband about the things in his life he needs to change. He has low self esteem. She shuts up about it and starts encouraging him, his self esteem grows. It was quite obvious. Not that I don’t think praying for your husband’s self image isn’t important – I just think the scenario just backs up my view of it.
Read Chapter 28 of The Power of a Praying Wife and consider the following discussion questions. They are also posted on the forum at Hallee’s Daily Brew here, but the comments are open on this post if you prefer to discuss it here.
1. Is your husband’s perception of himself that of a successful man or does he have doubts about himself that creep into his job performance?
2. Is your perception of your husband that of a successful man, or do you feel like he should change? Do you verbally cheer your husband on, or do you constantly suggest ways he could improve?
3. Does your husband have feelings of rejection? Did he feel rejected in his past. Does he feel rejected by you? His children? His family members? Does he commonly anticipate being rejected by people?
4. Do you ever have feelings of rejection Do you ever feel rejected by your husband? Is rejection a part of your past?
5. Ephesians 1:3-6 says: Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved. Write this Scripture as a prayer for your husband and for yourself.
6. Part of being accepted by other people has to do with accepting who we are in the Lord first. Do you feel your husband accepts himself, or is hard on himself? Do you accept yourself or are you hard on yourself?
7. Pray the prayer out loud on page 192 of The Power of a Praying Wife. Include specifics about your husband’s self esteem.
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